Ruminator

Photo by: Tim Bindner I am about to tell you about three separate days of hiking. Two at the same location and one at another. A grand total of 13+ miles over three days. Day 1: November 3, 2023 I was off work and planned on heading to the park office prior to hitting the trails. Stanley, my friend, and the property manager, wants me to stop by after 8:30am. He has a map of the property and wants to share some hidden gems he found while hiking. The park sold property maps (well, gave them away) and horse maps (that cost $10). The horse maps were more detailed but mainly show the horse trails. Stanley took his horse map and transposed hiking trails and locations on it by drawing various routes he had done. I bought a horse map and will also follow his lead and create my own custom map. I was told by Stanley that there was a mountain bike convention in Campground A and there were many bikers going to be on the trails for the next three days. My original plan was to hike the R...

Photo by: Tim Bindner Saturday October 28, 2023. I woke at 6am and gathered my things. I ate breakfast and loaded my stuff in the car before making the 15-minute drive to Mount Saint Francis. There was unseasonably warm weather for this time of year, and we expected rain tomorrow, so this would be my only chance to hike this weekend. I expected today and tomorrow to be in the mid-sixties before Monday, and the rest of the week would only reach high in the upper forties. I drove to Mount Saint Francis in the dark. My wipers were on as the mist covered my front windshield. This was not fog, but a light mist. I soon arrived in the parking lot and sat in my car, debating if I wanted to hike or not. I don’t mind cool weather, but rain can make things miserable and dangerous. After five minutes, I made my mind up to hike. Heading down the initial path towards the woods, my glasses got covered by the light mist. I had a baseball cap on, but the brim only blocked part of mother nature’s spray....

Drawing by: Shawn Coss I have well-documented my mental health journey. Through counseling and my research, I am trying to learn what makes me tick. This has been and will be a lifelong journey. Part of that research leads me to purchasing a book. The book is called It’s All In Your Head: 2 nd Dose Edition , and it is by Shawn Coss. I stumbled upon this book through a social media page, and what initially struck me and drove me to purchase the book were two things. First were the illustrations by Shawn in the book and next, how he laid out the book. According to the book, Shawn has depression, anxiety, and many other things I also suffer from. I quickly learned this book is something I can relate to. The layout of his book is simple. On the left-hand page, he has a drawing depicting the disorder or phobia. On the right-side, he has a disorder or phobia. Shawn typically gives his own account of how he addresses that topic, using a concise description based on the disorder’s technical d...

Photo by: Tim Bindner This week was rough. I had to get out to the woods and hike. I did, and the views were wonderful. However, I have a question for you. I arrived at O’Bannon Woods State Park around 8am. I noticed one truck in the parking lot, but it seemed like someone had parked it there overnight. Parking my car, grabbed my gear and made my way towards the trail. The cool 48-degree air electrified my senses as I crossed the locked gate and headed down the horse trail. The gravel and loose leaves beneath my feet made the first part of the journey sketchy, but soon I found my rhythm. I made my way past the campground and the campfire smoke filled my nose. I saw the beams of sunrays kissing the tops of the trees as I descended further into the woods. Soon I could no longer hear any sounds or smell the campfire smoke. A dog was barking in the distance as I began, and that also faded. I was alone. My destination was Sharpes Cemetery. A small place deep in the woods close to this horse...

Photo by: Tim Bindner Yesterday afternoon I got a text from a local farmer. He responded to a text I sent a few days earlier asking him when they plan to cut. His response is “ we are finishing up at another location but should be home this afternoon ”. I have been to this farm before and spoke to the owner Daryl a few times since. He is a kind man, likely in his seventies, and has had this farm in his family for generations. Here is a link to my blog post from my last visit – https://timothybme.com/down-on-the-farm/ . Arriving at the farm, I saw to my right a few machines had already begun cutting down the corn stalks. There were a few semi-trucks in front of me, so I snaked my way past them and parked in a grass field opposite the corn field. I grabbed my camera and headed for the expansive corn fields of Hauswald Farms. The area below Highway 62 in the picture above is all the farms. Today I was where the gray Hauswald Farm pointer was on the map. All my shots were in the field to t...

Photo by: Tim Bindner There is a lyric from a song called Too Much Information by The Police that was appropriate for how I felt this weekend. The lyrics are “ Too much information running through my brain. Too much information driving me insane ”. Between Friday night and Saturday, I experienced a lot of stimuli and decision making that had my head spinning. I will discuss that in a later post, but today I want to talk about Sunday. Sunday morning, I needed a break. My body needed a break, and so did my mind. I received a new camera lens in the mail and made plans to meet Mark at Mt. Saint Francis at 8am for a hike. I hoped for a peaceful walk to clear my head. When I arrived, the lot was full of cars, and Mark was sitting parked in his. I pulled in next to him, got out, grabbed my gear, and prepared for a trek. The 52-degree air had me questioning whether I should go short sleeve or a hoodie. I chose short sleeves. It was a wonderful decision. I was sweating by the time I returned ...

Photo by: Tim Bindner Saturday morning, I hit the trail for the first time this season. I didn’t know how much I missed it. My legs, however, quickly reminded me. I woke up around 6 am. Quietly got out of bed so as not to disturb my wife, got dressed, ate breakfast, and waited. I had my gear ready the night before, other than my water. Mark and I agreed he would pick me up at 8 am, and then we headed to O’Bannon Woods State Park. He arrived a few minutes early. I grabbed my camera, backpack, jacket, kissed Marcie, and headed out to my driveway. The drive was nothing special, but my anticipation was building. We saw someone at the gate, but no admission was required. Mark made a slight right turn and soon parked us under the fire tower, where we began gathering our things. My goal today was to hike the Fire Tower trail one way for 2 miles, then make the return trip back. It was 43 degrees, and I could feel the electricity in the air. Electricity brought on by the excitement of doing wha...

Photo by: Tim Bindner I recently sold a photographic print. The subject from my last blog post titled ‘ 2 versions ’. The same person has bought prints from me before and loved the dark version and wanted to purchase a print of it. They even dubbed it “ a masterpiece ” and “ priceless ”. I shared the news with some friends of my sale, and one friend stated “ you are talented ” to which a snarky replied, “ I point the camera and push the button. Camera does all the hard stuff ”. Her rebuttal floored me. “ Not everyone can see the beauty and knows what to capture ”. Such a simple and kind statement, but it took me aback. It also got me thinking. The reason I got into photography was to slow things down. Mainly slow down my brain. To focus (yes, it’s a pun) on something and capture (or try to) what I was seeing and feeling at that moment. Dr. Erin and my friend Mark asked if the ‘ dark ’ edit was coming from a place of darkness or a reflection of the major medical issue I had that day. Th...

Photo by: Tim Bindner Today I looked at one of my previous photographs and it inspired me to edit the original composition differently. As you know, I love black and white, but I took this one is in color. It turns out to be of my favorite shots I have ever taken. Dr. Erin even purchased this one (the original version), and it is hanging in her office. I took the shot at Mount Saint Francis at 8:40am on Thursday, November 24, 2022. Little did I know what the day had in store for me. They admitted me to the hospital for a heart attack that occurred during or after taking this memorable picture. For me, the picture stands alone from the memories I will have of what happened later and this shot does not remind me of that ill-fated day. More of the moment I captured it. When I took this photograph, I felt I captured something more spiritual. More ethereal. Certainly, more natural. What caught my eye was the fog coming through the trees and the rays of sun illuminating the bench below. I di...

Here is my attempt at writing a poem about the recent trip I took. Lake Michigan Oh, Lake Michigan, vast and blue, your beauty knows no bounds. From sandy shores to crashing waves, your magic is all around. I love to watch the sunrise paint your waters a golden hue and end the day with moonbeams dancing and shimmer as the skies lose all its blue. Your waters hold a thousand tales of ships that sailed and sank, of ancient tribes and voyageurs, who braved the storms and quenched themselves as they drank. You’re home to fish and birds and gulls, and creatures yet unknown. A wild and wondrous place, where life in all its forms has grown. Oh, Lake Michigan, my heart’s delight, I’m grateful for your grace. May your waters always sparkle, and your beauty never fade. Until next time, Tim

Photo by: Tim Bindner Last weekend Marcie and I went to northern Indiana and southern Michigan. It was a quick trip, but we got to see one of my favorite places and relaxed a bit. From our home, the trip took roughly 4.5 hours. A straight shot up I-65 through Indianapolis and eventually into Michigan City, Indiana. Driving through the farmlands of Indiana can bore too many, but for me, it is peaceful. I have always found a calmness in looking out over rows of corn, old farm homes and red barns. Heck, I drove through Seymour, Indiana, home of Live Aid founder John Mellencamp. Friday afternoon, we arrived at our motel, dropped off our stuff, and headed out to our first destination. Washington Park Beach and Michigan City East Pierhead Lighthouse draw many people throughout the summer. Today it had some people milling around, but it was not very crowded. As we parked and unloaded, we could see and hear the gulls flying around, kids yelling and laughing, and see the lighthouse in the dista...

Photo by: Tim Bindner My wife recently started a new job with a new company after 17 years at Humana. Her second week at the company, her boss had an in-person meeting, which she likes to do twice a year. Marcie’s boss was in Cleveland, Ohio, so I took a few days off, drive her to Cleveland and spent my free time shooting a place I had never been too. We arrived Tuesday afternoon, unloaded at our hotel, relaxed for a short bit after a 5.5-hour drive, and then I drove Marcie to her first location. A bar/restaurant called Collision Bend Brewing Company, in the “flats” of downtown Cleveland. Per advice from her boss and a friend that I planned to meet the next day “it is not a good idea to walk around that area”, so I stayed in a parking lot next to the bar. The temperature was a refreshing 65 degrees. The warmth of the sun and gentle breeze were enjoyable, but it met me with complete silence when I turned to my left. I grabbed my camera, hopped out of my car, and began shooting. This thi...

Photo by: Tim Bindner After recently writing about my “why” I began thinking a bit more about that subject and “why” I love photography. Specifically, the unique appeal between color and monochrome (black and white) for me. Many people I know dislike, or don’t prefer monochrome photography. My wife is one, my friend Mark is another. I have found that a vast majority of people have similar tastes. I do not. I set my camera up to view in black and white, regardless of the outcome of the picture I capture. This is how I compose each of my shots. I also have the luxury with digital technology to turn a color photo into black and white and vice versa. I began my photography career in high school shooting, developing, and printing all in black and white. Part of this was because of the price (black and white was cheaper), and partly because they printed our high school newspaper in black and white. Again, due to cost. Black and white were also more popular and easier to produce prints from. ...

Photo by: Tim Bindner What is my why? Google states your “Why” is a statement of purpose that describes why you do the work you do and why you live the lifestyle you do. It is your calling. It is your conviction. I have been thinking about the “Why” of my life. Just as much as happiness is something that’s unique for every single person, the “Why” differs from person to person. My friend Wes said, “ God has created you with gifts, abilities, experience, and personality to impact the world… no other person has the combination of these things — just you!! Use who God has created you to be with your strengths and gifts; use your story to shine a light on Him .” He then added, “ T he same God who created all those mountains you like snapping. He made you too. No wonder you like nature, you have the same Creator. Common bond .” At age 55, I sometimes am still trying to figure out my purpose in life. Defining my “Why” is part of that journey. I have a good job that I like, but that ...

Photo by: Tim Bindner Recently I had a friend’s post on Facebook. “ Some of you need to chill out. Most of life is not that urgent. Breathe, relax, and enjoy the moment .” They did not direct this at me, but it got me thinking, as usual. The person who posted the message is retired. I have heard people with lots of money say things like money is not important. I have heard others that are secure in certain aspects of their life (love, finances, job, etc.) to not worry so much about something they are already secure in. It is easy to tell others to chill, don’t worry, or relax, but for people like me, it is not so easy to do. My in-laws (retired) decide to do things at the last minute, or just have tasks they do whenever they decide to. Not an issue usually, but they are often trying to do things they cannot do on their own, because of their age and physical ability. When they decide to do certain tasks, my wife runs to help them. This means if I am not working, I...

Today’s post is a very touchy subject but one that has been on my mind for a while, and I feel I need to write about it. I also need your help in understanding the logic behind it, because I do not get it. Recently, as I often do, I had the television on for some background noise. I stray from national news and often even local news unless they are discussing the weather. This day I was not paying attention and had NBC Nightly News on with Lester Holt. The story that came on not only shocked me, but had me questioning the point of the story. Our country, unfortunately, has a brutal past with slavery. Though the United States is not the worst country (by numbers), I feel even one slave is too many. Burma, Japan, Pakistan, India, and many other countries had greater numbers of slaves than ever held in the United States, but that is not the point here. I would really like you to pause and watch this piece I am about to talk about. Click HERE ! After watching the story, again I recognize t...

Photo by: Tim Bindner I was told in the past by someone who used to support my blogs that “if it is about photography, I just instantly delete it.” Today’s post is about that topic, and thus this warning. I will not get into technicalities of the photography but explaining why and how I took the above photograph. Also, what inspired me to do so. So be warned, now is the time to “delete” if you don’t want to go any further. Recently I watched a YouTube video from a person who went out and shoot scenes like the famous photographer, Saul Leiter. Watching the video, I imagined myself trying this as well. Since I was going to the mountains of Colorado, why not try to shoot a shot like Ansel Adams? You can read more about Ansel Adams in the link below. To summarize, he was the most famous landscape, black and white photographer ever known. He produced color shots later in his career. My inspiration for the above shot and much of my work started and continues to be because of him. If you do n...

Photo by: Tim Bindner Day 6: June 18, 2023 This would be our last full day in our Airbnb and in this part of Colorado. We would be returning to a place we had been to before (almost) but visiting an amazing sight. Today’s drive would span 108 miles total and take me to a very uncomfortable place. One, however, Marcie loved. Leaving our ‘home’ we drove briefly east on Highway 162 before merging onto Highway 285 heading south for 21 miles. It was early Sunday morning and traffic was almost non-existent. At the light, we turned left onto Highway 50, then quickly and left, continuing Highway 50 before turning right into the parking lot of Robin’s. I had the French toast and water, and Marcie had eggs and sausage, I believe. We arrived a few minutes before they opened and after entering and ordering within a few minutes, there was a long line to get in. I drove east on Highway 50 for another 54 miles. A route we had done on the previous day. The sun was still low on the horizon, but made be...