Skip to main content

I'm a failure...

Photo by: Tim Bindner

I recently watched a video of a photographer I follow and part of his message in that video struck a chord with me. Now, before you non-photographers tune out, I will tie in his message to everyday life and how I see it aptly applies. Stick with me.

The video was titled ‘I’m a failure…’. In this video, he spoke of various things he failed at in 2021 with his photography. One thing, however, stood out to me and I feel this is a bigger message towards life. He mentioned many of his pictures were “grabbing the mundane shots, which were boring.” Though he never said it directly, I got a sense he was shooting shots based on what was popular and had seen many times before on social media. His observation grabbed me.

In life, I see so many people deciding based on what is popular. Owning the latest iPhone, where they live, what popular shows social media tells them to watch, what they drive, what to wear, how to eat, where they vacation and so on. Again, I got a sense that this YouTuber/photographer was taking photographs that were popular for others and not for himself. Thus self-labeling them as “boring”.

I pride myself on liking what I like and not liking what I don’t. I, like everyone else, am influenced by social media and society, but having a personally that questions/researches everything, I often stray from the ‘popular stuff’. Especially after researching it. I often run from the herd, and make my path.

On a recent hike, my friend and I talked about how some pictures we take and we love get few likes on Instagram, while others we think are bland or not great get many more likes on social media. A perfect example of working for social influence and not for our own inspiration and likes.

Challenge yourself to think. To question. Do your research. Make your own decisions. Do what makes YOU happy and not what society tells you that is best for you. By doing this simple act, your freedom and happiness will blossom.

His video also made me question some of my current decisions/choices, and I am contemplating something big (possibly) soon. More to come on that later.

Until next time,

Tim (Kilmer)

Comments

Popular posts from this blog

Nobody's Listening

  I recently had conversations with two people I know that had experienced a sudden rash of acute anxiety. One was medication related, the other was situational. Both stated that they now had a better understanding of what I have been dealing with. With the recent changes to my medication, Although I still feel anxiety, it no longer takes control of my emotions like it did in the past. However, I know acutely that it still lurks on the fringes, patiently awaiting its chance to pounce on me. During my recent visit to Dr. Erin, she assigned me an exercise where I had to jot down three things each day that I felt I excelled at. This is proving to be difficult for me. The parameters are straightforward and easy to understand. “Anything I do well that day,” she said. As I continued with this exercise, I began thinking of a song by Linkin Par called Nobody’s Listening. I got a heart full of pain, head full of stress Handful of anger held in my chest And everything left’s a wast...

Rumination

  I've found myself stuck in a loop lately. It's like my mind is on a hamster wheel, endlessly circling the same thoughts. I can't seem to shake them. It's exhausting. I've been there. That place where thoughts loop around and around, like a broken record stuck on the same groove. It's like my mind is a haunted house, and these persistent thoughts are the ghosts haunting me. I'll be thinking about something, maybe a conversation I had earlier in the day, and then suddenly, I'm spiraling. I'm replaying every word, every gesture, analyzing every detail. It's like a broken record, playing the same tune repeatedly. It's not just conversations, either. I can ruminate about my to-do list, my relationships, or even the weather. It's as if my brain is determined to find a problem, no matter how small. Rumination, as it's called, can be a real drain. It's like trying to go against the flow of a strong current. No matter how hard I ...

Waiting for the End to Come

  I have been in a funk lately. I am adjusting to my anxiety medicine, and I feel it is working, but maybe too well. Last week I met with Dr. Erin. She, of course, asked me how I was feeling and honestly, I told her I was not really feeling anything. We dug deeper, and she explained that my anxiety prior to the medicine was like a roller coaster. I had extreme highs and extreme lows. Now with the medicine it is more of a flatter track. I am not hitting the lows; Like I was before (which is good), but also not hitting the highs either. I feel like I am purely existing. Little desire to do much of anything. It’s true my passions are hiking and photography, which I do little of in the summer because of ticks, heat, and snakes. I know fall is approaching and I hope that helps me get out of this funk somewhat. I will also speak to my psychiatrist about lowering my dosage to see if that helps. Even my writing has been affected. I have not had the desire to write. Music, however, ha...