Fire Tower Trail - The Return

I hiked, I shot some wonderful photos and had great conversations with a friend. The woods provided me sanctuary today.

Today was the first day since last spring that I hiked at O’Bannon Woods State Park. This place has an abundance of ticks, and also bow hunting season has begun, so I was nervous.

Mark arrived a bit before 8am, and we drove his Jeep through the thick fog toward the State Park. No attendant was at the gate, so we slowly drove past the shack and made our way toward the campground. I had a planned route in mind, and the first location we visited was new to Mark. That is a rarity that anywhere I go he has not already been to.

The leaves have begun to change in my area, though there was still plenty of foliage to hamper views of the surrounding forest. It was 41 degrees and Mark and I were walking down an old gravel road mainly used by horseback riders, hikers and an occasional official forestry vehicle. To make things even more spectacular, we had fog surrounding us.

Once we had left the campground area, a hush fell over the forest. The cool air, fog and remaining leaves muffled any sound other than our own voices. We continued to walk and wonder at the beauty surrounding us. It was not long before we reached Sharpes Cemetery. This small plot of land holds 12 different souls, with the oldest birth belonging to William Sharp, who was born in 1770.

Mark and I spent some time here taking photos, checking out the headstones, then we headed back the way we came and turned onto the Fire Tower Trail. Unlike the previous road, we were now on a thin trail used by mountain bikers and hikers. As we moved along the path, the sun was rising and providing spectacular beams of light through the trees and illuminated by the fog. Mark spotted the first rays and then the shots began. As we continued along the trail. I saw one large sunbeam lighting up a small area about 50 feet off the trail. Mark saw it to and within moments he was bushwhacking through the woods to stand under that sunbeam. Naturally, I took a picture.

It felt good to be out in the woods. It felt good to be with my friend. I captured some really pleasant pictures, but more than that, for a brief period, my worries and anxiety dissipated. We hiked for slightly over 2 hours, covering about 4 miles. I am glad my hiking season has begun again. “Sky above, earth below, peace within.”

Until next time,

Tim (Kilmer)

Comments

Nobody's Listening

I recently had conversations with two people I know that had experienced a sudden rash of acute anxiety. One was medication related, the other was situational. Both stated that they now had a better understanding of what I have been dealing with. With the recent changes to my medication, Although I still feel anxiety, it no longer takes control of my emotions like it did in the past. However, I know acutely that it still lurks on the fringes, patiently awaiting its chance to pounce on me. During my recent visit to Dr. Erin, she assigned me an exercise where I had to jot down three things each day that I felt I excelled at. This is proving to be difficult for me. The parameters are straightforward and easy to understand. “Anything I do well that day,” she said. As I continued with this exercise, I began thinking of a song by Linkin Par called Nobody’s Listening. I got a heart full of pain, head full of stress Handful of anger held in my chest And everything left’s a wast...

Rumination

I've found myself stuck in a loop lately. It's like my mind is on a hamster wheel, endlessly circling the same thoughts. I can't seem to shake them. It's exhausting. I've been there. That place where thoughts loop around and around, like a broken record stuck on the same groove. It's like my mind is a haunted house, and these persistent thoughts are the ghosts haunting me. I'll be thinking about something, maybe a conversation I had earlier in the day, and then suddenly, I'm spiraling. I'm replaying every word, every gesture, analyzing every detail. It's like a broken record, playing the same tune repeatedly. It's not just conversations, either. I can ruminate about my to-do list, my relationships, or even the weather. It's as if my brain is determined to find a problem, no matter how small. Rumination, as it's called, can be a real drain. It's like trying to go against the flow of a strong current. No matter how hard I ...

Waiting for the End to Come

I have been in a funk lately. I am adjusting to my anxiety medicine, and I feel it is working, but maybe too well. Last week I met with Dr. Erin. She, of course, asked me how I was feeling and honestly, I told her I was not really feeling anything. We dug deeper, and she explained that my anxiety prior to the medicine was like a roller coaster. I had extreme highs and extreme lows. Now with the medicine it is more of a flatter track. I am not hitting the lows; Like I was before (which is good), but also not hitting the highs either. I feel like I am purely existing. Little desire to do much of anything. It’s true my passions are hiking and photography, which I do little of in the summer because of ticks, heat, and snakes. I know fall is approaching and I hope that helps me get out of this funk somewhat. I will also speak to my psychiatrist about lowering my dosage to see if that helps. Even my writing has been affected. I have not had the desire to write. Music, however, ha...

Ruminator

Search This Blog