Chris Cornell

Chris Cornell – pressfoto Copywrite NewsVoice

On May 18, 2017, the world lost one of my all-time favorite singers. Second, only to Prince, this man embodied the soul, power, passion, and voice that I could and still relate to. Chris Cornell ended his own life, but for me, his legacy lives on in his music, recorded voice, and most importantly his lyrics.

I have a deep connection with music. I think and hear life through music. A phrase, word, or memory ties me back to a song or lyric numerous times each day. Chris Cornell who wrote and sang for Soundgarden, Audioslave, Temple of the Dog, and then his own solo work was a discovery I am so glad I had back in the late 1980s.

What did Chris do for me? In the late 80’s I was in high school. I was a confused kid, who had to live up to my parents, friends, and societal standards. I had all these confusing thoughts and feelings constantly running through my head. I was bullied and thus had (and still do have) low self-esteem. In my mood swings from high to low, I had fleeting thoughts of depression, and dare I say suicide (but never had the courage to act upon it). Ironically Chris ended his own life.

As I went deeper into music, artists like Prince, Chris, Eddie Vedder, and Chester Bennington showed me that my irrational thoughts (my mom’s words not mine), we’re actually normal, and dare I say okay? I bonded with these strangers who spoke directly to me. These lyricists had the power to tell me I was normal and so was what was spinning in my head.

Below are some of my favorite lyrics by Chris. Before anyone sounds the fire alarm, I am NOT suicidal, I am NOT depressed and in fact, these lyrics ground me and calm my erratic brain. I have listed the lyric followed by the song title and group (thought Chris wrote all these lyrics). Below each is a small reason I love that particular lyric.

“Stop you’re trying to bruise my mind. I can do it on my own. Stop you’re trying to kill my time. It’s been my death since I was born. I don’t remember half the time if I’m hiding or I’m lost. But I’m on my way.” – Searching with My Good Eye Closed (Soundgarden). I have had struggles like most people. I have drifted, had good times and bad, but regardless I keep moving. I beat myself up enough on my own. Sometimes it may be in the wrong direction, but there is always movement.

“Words would you say. Never seem to live up to the ones inside your head. The lives we make. Never seem to ever get us anywhere but dead.” – Day I Tried to Live (Soundgarden). This is why I blog and why I give advice. I truly try to help people, but it so often falls on deaf ears. My brain often has the perfect words, but I cannot seem to get them out.

Someone tried to tell me something. Don’t let the world bring you down. But nothing can do me in before I do myself. – Blow up the Outside World (Soundgarden). This is the entire theme of my blog. I overthink everything and go straight to the negative of situations as a way of self-preservation. Most people look for the good in things, I look for the fight in everything.

“That I’m lost, behind. The words I’ll never find. And I’m left behind. As the seasons roll on by.” and “Dreams have never been the answer, and dreams have never made my bed.” – Seasons (Chris Cornell). As one who suffers from (sometimes) debilitating nightmares, this lyric jumped out when I first heard it. So often in my world, I still feel lost, especially in 1992 when this came out. I was graduating from college and had no idea what I was going to do with my life. I was lost then and sometimes today I feel that way as well.

“Suddenly I can see everything that’s wrong. With me yeah. What can I do I’m the only thing I really have. At all.” – Can’t Change Me (Chris Cornell). We all do self-analysis. But I have learned to be me. It took me a long time to get there, but I have finally been trying to overlook my own faults and just be who I am. There is a strong sense of freedom with that.

“I don’t want to change anymore. I’ve already paid. I don’t have to pray anymore. Because my soul has been saved.” – Never Far Away (Chris Cornell). This is similar to the previous lyric. ‘I gave at the office’. I rarely give advice anymore and am focusing on me. I have learned people (including most of my friends) really don’t care deep down. We are in a self-centered, take care of number one, world. Though I care about people, now is time to take of me.

“Please, mother mercy. Take me from this place. And the long-winded curses. I hear in my head.” – Say Hello 2 Heaven (Temple of the Dog). This song came out not long after I lost a loved one. Death has always surrounded me and it hit the point back then and many years later when Chris, Chester, and Prince all died.

“In my eyes, indisposed. In disguises, no one knows. Hides the face, lies the snake. The sun in my disgrace.” – Black Hole Sun (Soundgarden). For years I hid my true feelings. I hid the true me. I put up a front and behaved and acted like people wanted me to. I was in disguise that no one knew.

“To be yourself is all that you can do.” – Be Yourself (Audioslave). See the theme here? Living a lie was rough on me. Now I am living for Tim. I still struggle, but I am becoming happier the longer I am on this journey.

“Every time I stare into the sun. Trying to find a reason to go on. All I ever get is burned and blind. Until the sky bleeds the pouring rain.“ – Nearly Forgot My Broken Heart (Chris Cornell). I get hurt, we all do. I struggle, we all do. So often I have to dig deep to take the next step. Sadly Chris could not.

“Life ain’t nothing if it ain’t hard. It’ll show you who you truly are. Knock you down when you get too tall. Till you spun around in a free fall. But somewhere out there past the storm. Lies the shelter of your heart.” – Before We Disappear (Chris Cornell). At age 52 I am finding that internal shelter. I am learning to be free of pressures well documented in previous blogs from my mom, family, friends, and society.

Again these may be depressing or seeming negative, but they give me strength and inspiration. Sadly we will never know the full potential of Chris Cornell. I feel blessed I was able to experience part of his soul through his music.

Depending on the feedback or response I get I may take some time to write about Prince, Eddie Vedder, and Chester Bennington in a similar fashion. I appreciate you taking the time on this lyrical journey and I hope this drives you to investigate Chris’ music a little closer.

Until next time,

Tim