Skip to main content

Who can I trust?

Photo by: Tim Bindner Photography

Self-Reflection is something I am still exploring every day of my life. I am trying to get better at it, but after 51+ years it is difficult. Can’t teach an old dog new tricks, or can you?

My decisiveness or an all or nothing (Dogmatic view) way of thinking is irrational thinking. I (and you) are bombarded via social media, news, and even with the conversations with friends and family to think and in many cases react/think this way.

I think I am right with my thinking and rational decisions. It is part of my defense mechanism. It is natural and promoted in our culture. The problem is not this way of thinking, but the fact that I tend to shut out or not listen to other points of view. I hear a topic or subject and immediately form or have formed an opinion about it, without listening. This is how my brain works.

So how am I going to change? I am going to rely on my wife and a very select few people to not just tell me what I want to hear, but when I tell them how I am thinking and feeling on a subject, then ask if I am ‘right’, I will hopefully have a strong enough relationship with that person and trust that I can listen and accept an opposing point of view. Listen before I set my mind. I have to get outside of my head and confide in others to get there. I want to keep maturing and grow up.

I know I have to change, to pivot the direction of my brain. The key aspect I want to change is my reaction to things. I can control my reactions through baby steps. Small changes and quit taking everything as a personal attack. Especially when another view differs from my own.

I have often said the key to any relationship is trust and communication. 95% of my communication is in my head. That is what I plan to change. I am wanting to talk things out (sorry dear), and ‘try’ to accept others’ perspectives (those I trust). I am looking for a few folks to keep me grounded and keep me in line. Any takers?

I will leave you with a quote from John F. Kennedy “Too often we hold fast to the clichés of our forebears. We subject all facts to a prefabricated set of interpretations. We enjoy the comfort of opinion without the discomfort of thought.” I am a thinker, but I strive to be a communicator as well.

Until next time,

Tim

Labels:

Comments

Post a Comment

Love to get your feedback on what you read!

Popular posts from this blog

Rumination

  I've found myself stuck in a loop lately. It's like my mind is on a hamster wheel, endlessly circling the same thoughts. I can't seem to shake them. It's exhausting. I've been there. That place where thoughts loop around and around, like a broken record stuck on the same groove. It's like my mind is a haunted house, and these persistent thoughts are the ghosts haunting me. I'll be thinking about something, maybe a conversation I had earlier in the day, and then suddenly, I'm spiraling. I'm replaying every word, every gesture, analyzing every detail. It's like a broken record, playing the same tune repeatedly. It's not just conversations, either. I can ruminate about my to-do list, my relationships, or even the weather. It's as if my brain is determined to find a problem, no matter how small. Rumination, as it's called, can be a real drain. It's like trying to go against the flow of a strong current. No matter how hard I ...
Post a Comment
Read more

Nobody's Listening

  I recently had conversations with two people I know that had experienced a sudden rash of acute anxiety. One was medication related, the other was situational. Both stated that they now had a better understanding of what I have been dealing with. With the recent changes to my medication, Although I still feel anxiety, it no longer takes control of my emotions like it did in the past. However, I know acutely that it still lurks on the fringes, patiently awaiting its chance to pounce on me. During my recent visit to Dr. Erin, she assigned me an exercise where I had to jot down three things each day that I felt I excelled at. This is proving to be difficult for me. The parameters are straightforward and easy to understand. “Anything I do well that day,” she said. As I continued with this exercise, I began thinking of a song by Linkin Par called Nobody’s Listening. I got a heart full of pain, head full of stress Handful of anger held in my chest And everything left’s a wast...
Post a Comment
Read more

Walk Tall

  I recently listened to a song by one of my favorite artist’s name John Mellencamp . The song is called Walk Tall . As I listened to the lyrics, I could not help reflecting on the world around me. John states: The simple minded and the uninformed Can be easily led astray And those that cannot connect the dots Hey, look the other way People believe what they wanna believe When it makes no sense at all… This is a recurring sight for me, encountered daily on social media, in conversations, on the news, and most notably in politics. People readily accept Facebook, MSNBC, CNN, or even their neighbor’s post on any platform as the ultimate truth. Very few people bother to delve into the facts, and it’s even worse how furious they get when faced with differing opinions. A point proven recently with a post I saw on Facebook. Someone stated, “this proves people will argue about anything”. There was a picture of a plastic cup of water that was ¾ full. The caption below said a fu...
1 comment
Read more