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Loyality

Photo by: Tim Bindner Photography (https://www.instagram.com/timothybme/)

I am loyal to a fault.  Throughout my life, I have taken on other problems as my own.  In 2007 a significant event happened in my life wherein I started turning inward and did more self-analyzing instead of sharing my feelings and innermost thoughts with others.  

As I approach 50 years old I realize this is maybe not the best way to do things but is by far the safest for me.  As my previous blog mentioned I have taken a good hard look at my ‘friends’ and have realized that I have only a treasured few.  Most of them are more defined as acquaintances.  Taking on other problems has caused me stress, self-inflicted, but stress none the less.  I am trying to change.  I am loyal to people which is a wonderful trait.  Sometimes it is to the point of toxicity.   This loyalty is often used against me to the point that the relationships for me become toxic.  I am deciding to move on in relationships that are not in my best interest.  This does hurt my heart but I need to let people go, including a lifelong friend and some I have only known a short time.

As the stresses build up in my life, I find the woods are the place for me to become grounded.  I have decided I want to hike at least once a weekend and possibly a few evenings once the days become longer.  I am doing this for my mind, soul and a little for my body.  This journey will be one I most likely take on my own and I am okay with that.  I know many people who love the idea of hiking and say they will join me but ultimately life gets in their way and I find myself going solo.

I have officially moved to full-time work at home position.  This is a blessing for me because I don’t have to deal as much with the sometimes phoniness I see in the office.  I can focus on my work and not have to play the games that occur in the office setting.

I am also trying to read more.  If you know me you know I hate to read, or should I say struggle to read.  I have recently been reading my friend Michael’s blog.  Michael just recently retired from Humana and now has more time to dedicate to his blog and other things he enjoys.  I hope to get to that place someday.  Follow Michael here – http://tiedyedmystic.blogspot.com/?_sm_au_=iVVFZ13FP5QZ3j2F

I plan to hit the trails both Saturday and Monday with blogs to follow about both hikes.  I will have my camera as usual and try to document what I see.  After this week’s stress, I am hoping these two hikes will help to center me.  Life comes at you from different sides and with different intensities, I am just glad I found my way to counteract and deal with it ……. Hiking!

Until next time,

Tim

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