Ruminator

  Today I went for a solo hike. It had been two weeks since I hit the trails and my body, mind and spirit needed this. As I drove to O’Bannon Wood State Park, the mist hit my window, and the overcast skies seemed to reflect my recent mood. I debated going today, but my wife insisted I go. She knows how much it helps me and my recent stresses at work had to be purged. As I arrived at the gravel parking lot, I suspected it was empty. It was 8:30am on a cold and rainy day. Perfect to wash away my anxiety. Climbing out of the car and the 37-degree air, a slight breeze and mist hit my face. I became energized. I have a t-shirt that says ‘I’m not crazy. My reality is just different from yours’ that I thought of. My wife and friends would disagree and simply call me crazy. As I left my car and headed toward the trail, the air was crisp and cool, carrying the scent of damp earth and decaying leaves. The light mist adds a touch of mystery, blurring the edges of the trees and cloaking...

  Today I am starting a series of posts about my photography. I know this will turn some of my readers off, as I was once told “ your photography posts are boring, I don’t read them, I just delete them ”, but it is in the spirit of New Year resolutions, Instagram top 9, Spotify top song list, etc. My goal is simple. I will review all my pictures I took for each month in 2023 and pick my favorite for that month. I will also explain why the one I chose is my favorite. Not based on technical data, but on feeling, emotions, or experience. I am not looking for the best photo I took or even a perfect photo (as I have none), but my favorite of that month. Unlike Instagram, my choice will be my own, not based on likes. Some months will be difficult, like the month I spent in Colorado. Other months may be challenging, as I don’t hike or explore in summer months. However, I challenge you as a reader to answer a few questions about each post if you would be so kind. The feedback and perspec...

Saturday’s hike covered 6.72 miles. My friend Amanda and my friend Mark, who had never met, accompanied me, and became friends on our journey today. Our destination was the Cole house. A place Amanda and I had hiked to a few weeks before, and a place Mark had also been to. So, I thought. I found out later, after we arrived at our destination, that he had, in fact, never been there. At first, the sun was peeking through the clouds. The three of us, after introductions in the parking lot, all debated on wearing jackets or sweatshirts. I debated a sweatshirt or t-shirt. It was 45 degrees but felt warm because of the sun. We all dawned sweatshirts, which was a wise decision. As Amanda and Mark got acquainted, we took the familiar horse train down toward Blue River, then turned left and headed toward our location. The further down the path we went, the cooler the air got. There was a 9mph wind, mostly blocked by the trees, but soon the warm rays of sunlight became filtered by thick, o...

  After waiting a week, I finally got the results of my EGD and colonoscopy. I was unsure what to expect. Growing up, one thing I heard from my mom was “ you’re going to end up with stomach cancer ”. The reason she said this, I am unsure. As a child and through my years living under my parents’ roof, I drank a lot of sodas. As a result, I would burp a ton. My mom’s conclusion was not that I had a lot of gas built up in my stomach because of the carbonation, but she took it to the extreme and told me I was going to get stomach cancer. Tough love, huh? As I had my procedure and waited the few days after for the results, that saying, and my mom’s voice played on repeat in my head. I wondered, is the fate she so quickly sentenced me to as a younger person? Would it soon be my fate? I first read the test results online through my online chart. These results were in medical terms, with no written synopsis from my doctor. As most people do, I Googled the results to determine what th...

December 1 st , 2023 was a very eventful day. It began with the last prep for my EGD/Colonoscopy and ended with getting a new family member. After my procedure, the nurse gave me instructions to not drive for 24 hours, don’t use power tools and finally don’t make any legal decisions. Marcie took advantage of the last one. We left the hospital; I had my first meal at Five Guys, then we drove home. At the hospital, the discharge nurse had mentioned she had owned many dogs and that her Great Dane was the best dog she ever had. That planted the seed. Arriving home, Marcie, and I both began looking for Danes and breeders. At first, the closest one I could find was 2 hours away, and they had no puppies for sale. Then we found a place in Sellersburg, which is roughly a 30-minute drive from our home. After reviewing the photos, we reached out to the breeder and set up a time to go ‘look’. I knew ‘looking’ would not be the only thing we would be doing. When we arrived, the owner met u...

  On December 1st, I have two procedures being done. First is the EGD (remember Sam) and the second is my first colonoscopy. I am not excited about these. As I age and have various medical issues, I learn that there are more and more tests that I must endure. These all take time, cost a lot of money and then there is the joy of waiting for the results of each exam. This next exam, however, scares me. I have never been one who likes to give up control of my body. Being ‘put under’. I avoid alcohol, pain pills, and illegal drugs for this reason. There is a daily fight with demons within my head daily and I am unsure if letting my guard down (via drugs or alcohol) will weaken that defense I have built up. I don’t want my demons to escape. Have you seen an angry drunk or psychotic crackhead? The procedure will check if Sam is gone from my previous EGD, and the colonoscopy will detect any polyps or major issues in my lower gastrointestinal tract. If you recall with my last EGD I...